Monday, August 21, 2006

PERS - The Update of Your Life. Now. Live it. The Update of your Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife.

I thought that my dear loyal readers must be growing tired of my lack of updates, so I figured I must let you both in on what's going on with me as of late.

I no longer work at the call center where I was employed for close to two and a half years. It is such a relief to know that I will not be renting a full-size gas-guzzling SUV to someone who cannot afford it.

At first the job was tolerable. The calls were simple, the training - while moderately intense - was easy to follow, the rules were reasonable, and the work environment was relaxed.

Then half way through my inevitably terminal employment, things had changed, and I wish I could say that the changes were for the better.

Instead, the rules changed, the policies modified, and the workload was increased. The company strayed from their "employee friendly" mantra into a "customer first (employee last, if at all)" mentality. Most of the supervisors avoided conducting meetings and team briefings with the employees. We were no longer allowed to surf the Internet between phone calls. We were now taking additional calls that at one time only a local counter would handle. And yet our paycheques still stated the same hourly pay rate. (They've even recently raised the starting wage for new employees while keeping all current employees wages the same! Imagine that!)

Now, I know that some call centers don't allow you to surf the Internet anyway. I know this first hand as I have worked in several call centers with this policy intact. However, this was a brand new call center. They had new ideas for how to treat their employees (aka with a shred of respect).

When I went through the training program, they "proved" how they are different in a positive sense. It didn't take long before all the the fresh-faced supervisors got settled into their power-hungry mindsets, and their holier-than-thou attitudes.

It's not like I was a slacking, lazy call center representative. I shot to the top of the call center ranks, having maintained statistics that kept me in the top 10 of 500 people for almost 2 years. Not to sound braggish (...and oh, it will...), but Supervisors begged to have me on their team so they could have my stats on their charts and look good to the higher ups.

I was even promoted to a Scheduling Management position. I wanted to escape from the phones, and have a somewhat-normal desk job, and I thought that having that promotion was going to provide that.

So what went wrong? Well, as I said above: Rules changed.

The higher-ups were wrapping their bony fingers around the necks of those in control of taking me off the phones. It made it nearly impossible to work in the scheduling department; so much so that when I did get a chance to work there, I was so rusty on how to operate the databases and spreadsheets that I suffered a huge migraine headache every time.

This caused me to be fairly resentful of the managers at that point. I demoted myself to escape the migraines. I got less migraines being on the phone, if you can believe it.

I burned out August of last year and had to go on stress leave. Many were surprised that after working in so many call centers for so many years that I didn't go on stress leave earlier. It surprised me too.

I should have left after my stress leave was up, but the thought of searching for another job in Fredericton made me sick, considering the job market in the maritimes is either work in a call center or work for minimum wage. Thanks Frank McKenna. Your push to advance telecommunication technologies in the Maritimes has ushered in a new era of shitty-ass Call Centers. You sacrificed the mental health of thousands of Maritime citizens so we could have call display on our phones before anyone else. The psychiatrists of the region as well as pharmaceutical companies salute you!

Anyway, the truth is that I had to come up with a better plan for my career and my life. During my stress leave period, I started working hardcore on an art portfolio. It was time to go back to school, and I was going to be ready.

When I came back to work, nothing had changed, and for the remaining months of work, I was slowly losing my mind. I wasn't sure if school was going to be a sure thing at the time, and the people on the phones were becoming less tolerable to listen to.

I've now been accepted into George Brown College's Graphic Design program, and I couldn't be happier.

The thought of going back to school scared the hell out of me 2 years ago.

Now it seems so right.

I will be visiting family in Miramichi in the next few days, and it's off to Toronto at the end of the month.

I cannot wait.

Ciao.

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Saturday, August 05, 2006

POP MISC - The NAME WARS!

I was alerted today by the WOW Report of a "Social Security Index" on the PBS website. It basically allows you to search the 55000 most common last names and tells you where they rank in popularity.

This had me thinking; How can I have fun with this new found tool?

Then it came to me...I'll have A CELEBRITY NAME WWWAAAARRRR!

...Ahem...so here it is.

HILTON vs. RICHIE

Hilton (#1066) beats Richie (#4616) by a landslide, although if Nicole had the more common spelling of Ritchie (#1121) she would stand a fighting chance against the Hiltons. Not even a wild, uneven-eyed Doherty (#1194) can win against a Hilton.

AGUILERA vs. SPEARS

Spears (#692) kicks rival Aguilera's (#2525) ass in this battle, proving that having the better voice is no match for being unapologetically fug.

TIMBERLAKE vs. FEDERLINE

Is it any surprise to you that Timberlake (#6030) won over Federline (#44551) by a huge margin? Timberlake swiftly brings sexyback, while Federline takes the sexyaway.

LOHAN vs. DUFF

The Duffs (#1955) don't need to win by the skin of their cosmetically-altered horse teeth, as they easily pummel the fully-loaded Lohans, who don't even make the top 55000! Ouch!


....


I quickly became bored of searching for surnames of famously feuding celebrities, but I still wanted to tap this great resource for more information.

So I decided to have RANDOM NAME WAAAARRRRS!!

We like our Fries (#4559) but we'd rather have the Burger (#1526), but if we had to choose between condiments, we'd take Mayo (#926) over Mustard (#19269).

We'd much rather have Hair (#4575) than be Bald (#35752).

We'll take a Judge (#2755) over a Jury (#15335).

In a rainbow, Green (#35) is the clear colour of choice, followed by Blue (#1289), Orange (#6306), Red (#17505), Violet (#27392), while Indigo and Yellow fail to rank.



On the topic of colours, it's about to get pretty blue in here. If you're green, don't say I didn't warn you when you're face turns red.

We love our
Hoars (#12293) almost as much as we love our Virgins (#11526), but we're not a fan of Prudes (#18360).

Dicks
(#5956) are no match for Cox (#68), but we would take a Dick (#1105) over a Glasscock (#7008) anyday.

The real winner, however, is
Bush (#311), so it's no surprise that we'll choose a Ho (#1308) over a Mo (#17451).

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